Dear Angry Commenter

Dear Angry Commenter,

I feel so silly dedicating an entire blog post to you.

I mean, I write a blog post. You follow it with a scathing anonymous comment using a false, bad-ass email address that’s super original like, youareunreal@yahoo.com or youarealiar@yahoo.com. But because it’s not a real address, I can’t reply. And then you get super frustrated because your comment isn’t posted.

We seem to be establishing a pattern.

You keep haranguing me for “not taking responsibility”. Because you have no idea what I talk about with my friends or a counselor, I’m assuming you mean, “you’re not taking responsibility on your blog” or “you’re not taking responsibility in the way that I want you to”.  Based on the information that you’ve gleaned from Drew or his family, that is.

The thing is, you are SO angry. And your anonymous emails actually meet the criteria for “cyber harassment” at this point. Frankly, I’m getting concerned about your mental state. Because I’m a psychologist, I can write that statement with some authority behind it, not just in that vague way that non-psychologists write it. And because you clearly know me in real life, I’m getting concerned about your potential to harm me.

If you want me to be accountable, why don’t we start by actually having a conversation? You know, you pretend to be a normal, healthy person and contact me via phone, email, or FB message. That way, I can’t be accused of trying to elicit sympathy from my readers and you don’t look quite as crazy.

I suspect that despite knowing me in real life, you haven’t had a substantial conversation with me in well over a year, if not longer. Clearly, a conversation is overdue.

Be brave.

I’ll be nice, I promise. I’m super easy to talk to, I’ve been told.

Sincerely,

Tara

Comments

  1. Amy says:

    I wish the golden rules still applied: “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” To be fair, you have not wish ill-will or harm to anyone. Your blog is merely an outlet for you and your feelings. I’m sorry the people you are referring to dont have an equally healthy outlet for their feelings. Love you Tara, you don’t deserve to be abused like this.

  2. Wendi says:

    You can track the IP address that the email is coming from its pretty much a finger print in the cyber world it can pinpoint the location of the computer pretty much the area which it’s coming from…you can look up on the internet how to obtain the IP address its pretty easy no software required…it is a form of harassment so you could report it to the police, not sure how far you would want to take it…it would seem to me that the person or persons posting this stuff obviously has issues and the problem probably isn’t you if ya know what I mean. I can see how it can be upsetting and hurtful so difficult to ignore maybe letting them know that the IP can be tracked an they might not be so mighty if called out not hiding behind the screen and fake screen names…sorry to hear this still continues…I would think one moving forward with their life is taking accountability so it’s a moot issue really lol ones need for revenge always clouds judgment

  3. kelly says:

    My Friend Is A Cyber Cop And Can Offer Advice If You Need. Better To Let Law Enforcement Deal With Ths Then Attempt To Tackle It Yourself Outside Of DoneThe Reaching Out You’ve dOne. Way To Be The Bigger Person. Harassment is A crime, SoRry You ArE A Victim Of this.

  4. Claudia says:

    I agree with Kelly ^^^^ If it has escalated to bullying/threats, let the law deal with it. A person who would contact you in this way is not one with whom I’d want to take on a rational discussion. I’m so very sorry you are dealing with this. Divorce, and its fall out, is difficult enough…

  5. Christine says:

    The IP address can be tracked. If you are this concerned please contact the authorities. It is cyber crime and while that may seem innocuous it is very real. Don’t allow this person to hide in anonymity.

  6. Glenda says:

    I agree with all the above. And yes, they can be traced. I personally know someone who had to get law enforcement involved in a case similar to this. I would be concerned – even if it seems to be just asinine comments, this person sounds very disturbed and obsessed.

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